33. A real baseball team [sprite]
32. Massive tax breaks for all live music venues. [ajw]
31. Keep downtown stores and restaurants open extra late on Thursdays - consider 7pm closing. [jimz]
30. housing is cheap. [karl]
29. Regularly scheduled condom air-drops [sprite]
28. Public hangings of local politicians at the point each friday night. [ajw]
27. Extensive subway system. [ajw]
26. In "rare" comic crossover, several DC and Marvel heroes move to Da Burgh [sprite]
25. Free disco ball to all new residents. [ajw]
24. Mandatory "remedial English" programs for native Pittsburghers. [jimz]
23. Bike lanes & smooth roads. [ajw]
22. more REAL bookstores [sprite]
21. Real World 7, set in an ISDN/10BaseT wired house in Squirrel Hill. [clamen]
20. Anyone found doing less than 55mph through tunnels can be shot on sight [jch]
19. Any REAL bookstores. [rochberg]
18. none of those minor annoyances known as turn signals. [karl]
17. Sic the folks that made-over the airport on the rest of the city [sprite]
16. Helicopter shuttle service from the airport to CMU. [ajw]
15. Variable-speed slidewalks [sprite]
14. Non-moving pot holes. [andrej]
13. A quality cable-TV provider [clamen]
12. Buy some real snowplows. Use grit, not salt. [jch]
11. More than 1-bit weather space. [andrej]
10. Two birds: use existing potholes as spare sports stadiums [scottd]
9. Put all local tv talking heads up against the wall. Import real people. [jch]
8. Get rid of MLB team in favour of MLS. [jimz]
7. Free pizza and beer on Fridays [sprite]
6. Rename 'Pittsburgh' to 'Super-Fly' [ajw]
5. Open a real deli. anywhere. please. [magus]
4. Chinatown [sprite]
3. Make "the Strip" live up to its name [jimz]
2. Convert Civic Arena to Steam Arena [kosak]
1. Declare war on Cleveland. Level the place. Declare, "we know people are upset, but it had to go." [ajw]